The Amazing Race 21 Episode 1 Spoiler Review

Season 21 was previewed on CBS all week with an interesting tease of a $2 million cash prize. Ah, but it's a bit of a bait and switch. The $2 million will be awarded only if the team that wins tonight's first leg goes on to win the entire race. So, basically, only 1 team is eligible to win, and the moment they're eliminated, it's just another season of the Amazing Race.

And, hey, it's another season of the Amazing Race! Er, it will be another season of Amazing Race after football ends ... and 60 Minutes ... and, hey, does this show EVER start on time?

So the teams are: the Twins, the Texans, a guy from MegaDeath and his lawyer brother; Goat Farmers; the Non-Committal Dating Couple, of which she's a double-amputee; Super Cute Blonde Athletes; Older Engaged Couple and he's a lumberjack (and that's OK), Substitute Teachers (who are Amazing Race superfans and applied 7 times); Dating Divorced Couple, Chippendale Dancers (Jaymes & James ... no, really), and Married Monster Truckers. Alrighty, then.

The teams had to do a 10-storey rappel off a bridge just to get their first clue. From there, it was off to Shanghai, China. The teams had to make their way to a sports stadium for their next clue. It was a Roadblock: Score a point in table tennis against a Chinese junior champion. Except it's every team playing the same champion, and when she beats one player, she rotates to the next table and plays someone else and trades here paddle in for something more ridiculous: a clip-board, a frying pan, etc.

Meanwhile, the Monster Truckers wandered around and around the stadium searching for the clue.

Abbie was the first person to score a point, and they were on their way to a restaurant. The Twins quickly established themselves as the team who are going to fight the entire race.

On to the second Roadblock - eating frog Fallopian tubes. Ick. It's a dessert, apparently. It's not chocolate mousse, that's for darn sure. The non-ping pong player had to eat the frog. And again: Ick. The Monster Trucker dude, Rob, grabbed the papaya plates his with both hands and slurped them down, not reading the part of the clue that said he had to use his chopsticks. So he ended up with 2 more bowls to eat. Cuz the only thing better than frog Fallopian tubes is MORE frog Fallopian tubes. Gosh, I hope that trended on Twitter tonight.

The frog dessert led to a search for a woman using an abacus. Half the teams couldn't even pronounce it.

(Commercial commentary: So, according to the ad, drinking V8 makes you insane? Great selling point.)

From the abacus, it was off to the Pit Stop. The Dating Divorcees lapped the Non-Committal Dating Couple on the way, and Abbie and Ryan finish first and are the only team eligible for the $2 million prize. Amy and Daniel were No. 2, and they were mad at themselves because they told Abbie and Ryan where the abacus was. Cute Blondes were third, and the Chippendales chased them there thinking that was the way to the abacus.

The Twins were fourth. Monster Truckers recovered from the frog mistake and finished fifth.

The Lumberjacks were sent astray after looking for directions and went to the Bank of China, while the Chippendales and Rock/Law just couldn't find it even though they were in the right area.

Rock/Law were sixth. Goat Farmers were seventh. Substitute Teachers were eighth. Texans Trey and Lexi were ninth. Chippendales were tenth.

So the first team eliminated was Rob and Sheila. But that's OK. He's a lumberjack.