Survivor Caramoan Episode 13 Spoiler Review

It's the penultimate edition of this season's Survivor, with the 19-hour finale and reunion show taking up most of my Sunday.

The show opens with Eddie basically resigned to the fact that he's the next to go. Dawn, Erik and Brenda wondered out loud whether they should get rid of Cochran. Erik had an existential crisis - something about being in a beautiful prison. Then he tried to climb a coconut tree. He got pretty high, but not enough to get the coconuts. Yes, this is as exciting as the show as been so far.

Tree Mail was a BRAND NAME SMART PHONE loaded with video letters. Tears flowed freely so freely four of them drowned. Cochran's mother hoped he wasn't "charred or burned or anything" from not using enough sunscreen. That entire family needs its own reality show. 

So the loved ones come out. More tears. Geez, you'd think these people hadn't seen each other in a mont- oh, wait. Even Jeff cried for the first time at the loved ones reunions. Cochran to his mom: "Sorry I smell." 

Of course, the challenge involved teaming up with the loved one. The winner gets to take their loved one back to camp for an off-shore picnic on a boat. And probably a guest or two, if a decade worth of watching Survivor has taught me anything. Cochran and his mom had a nice visit during the challenge as they fell further and further behind.

Brenda and her dad won reward. They got to pick one other team, and she took Dawn and her husband. Then there was a twist, with the second loved ones for each Survivor. TWO LOVED ONES! More tears! Sherri literally collapsed in tears. So Brenda had to choose between giving one other Survivor the picnic, or giving it up for her and Dawn to give the other Survivors their other loved ones. THAT'S EVIL! So Brenda did the selfless thing, and gave up her reward (and Dawn's, and her husband), so the other four and their loved ones could have the BBQ instead. 

So the folks at the BBQ had a great time. Cochran's dad is as awesome as the rest of the family. CBS, GIVE THEM A SHOW!

Back at camp, Dawn cried and had a breakdown. Which is pretty much her normal course of action this season. Brenda did what she could to hold Dawn together. Brenda has had more TV time tonight than every other episode this season combined.

The immunity challenge was the classic winch over the water task. Brute strength, basically. Not surprisingly, Cochran was the first in the water. Eddie was second in, and unless there's a giant twist at camp, he's going home. Erik was third out, so the women were left. OK, I take back the brute strength comment. Sherri was next out. Dawn tried to strike a deal and Brenda said no. Brenda fell off and Dawn won immunity. In a cutaway, Brenda admitted she threw the challenge to keep "paranoid" Dawn happy. That should make for an uncomfortable moment on the reunion show Sunday.

Everyone agreed that Eddie was going home. And then Cochrane worked behind the scenes to try to blindside Brenda instead. This left Dawn going into Tribal Council confused and conflicted, but at least, not crying. 

At Tribal Council, Eddie basically said his goodbyes before everyone voted and said he'd had a great time. But, of course, this is Survivor, so BRENDA went home. And she was CRUSHED. The lesson, folks, is always take your loved ones on your reward. I'm pretty sure everyone who has given it up has been voted out on the same show. 

Next episode: Jeff shows up at camp in the middle of the night. That can't be good.


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