Dear Facebook: Knock it off with all the apps already!

Dear Facebook: I know it's been a rough couple of weeks, what with the IPO not turning out like you wanted.

But you're acting like an insecure child who, having been chastised by your parents, redoubles your efforts to impress and try harder. And you're not impressing us, you're just annoying us.

A Camera app? Really? Like the one thing missing from the average iPhone user's experience was camera app #1,894,882? The App Store is littered with camera apps. Yes, yes, we know you just bought Instagram for All The Money In The World and you feel you need to play with your new toy, and that's fine. And, yes, the Facebook Camera app does let you upload multiple photos at once ... unlike your existing iOS app.

Ah, yes, the Facebook app. See, Facebook, here's my real problem with the Camera App: why isn't that extra functionality built into your main app? I'm tempted to answer that rhetorical question by saying, "Because your main app is so buggy and slow and takes so long to load and let you update your status that it would take 100 years to upload six pictures." But I won't say that, even though it's entirely true.

And the problem I have with the Camera App is the same problem I have with Facebook Messenger and Facebook Pages: We don't need FOUR APPS to run Facebook properly. Well, actually, we DO need four apps to run Facebook properly, but that's only because the Facebook iOS app is ... well, see previous paragraph. But we SHOULDN'T need four apps to run Facebook properly on an iPhone. We should need one app: Facebook.

I mean, you don't see your friend Twitter requiring us to run Twitter, Twitter Pictures, Twitter Trends and Twitter Messages do you?

So, Facebook, knock it off with all the extra apps. Give us one, well-written Facebook app.

But I swear, if you release a Facebook Wall app that exists solely so we can update our status and read people's other status updates, I'm switching to MySpace. That's right, you heard me. MySpace.


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