Survivor Caramoan - Fans vs. Favorites Episode 1 Spoiler Review

It's a new season of Survivor - Survivor Caramoan (Survivor: Where?) Fans vs. Favorites is a fun iteration of the game, even if the name really should be "Marks vs. Gimmicks". And it's a 90 minute season premiere, meaning more time devoted to people lounging around camp.

As usual, this review CONTAINS SPOILERS. If you don't want to know what happened tonight, don't read on.

So the favorites include Erik, the former fan who gave away his immunity necklace in what was the DUMBEST MOVE IN SURVIVOR HISTORY, and Russell Hantz's Nephew, who DID THE EXACT SAME THING and is Russell Hantz's Nephew. Plus Secret Agent Man in his Bright Pink Underwear. And Cochran. And some former Survivors I really don't remember despite the fact I blog about every season. Apparently, the theme of the season is "people that made big mistakes". Meanwhile, I still think Caramoan is some place CBS invented. My Apple Maps doesn't list it at all. (Little Apple joke there...)

The tribes are fans vs. favorites, which is interesting as it puts all the favorites to win (so to speak) on the one tribe of returning Survivors. I figure at this point, Malcolm is the ringer on the favorites tribe because no one has seen him play before, as this was almost certainly filmed before the last season aired.

We go right to a reward challenge, for flint to get fire, and 20 lbs. of beans. The Faves won.

At their camp, the Fans bickered over whether they were going to build a shelter or build a fire. Over at the Faves camp, Francesca tried to make amends with Secret Agent Man, who still finds her annoying.

At the Fans camp, Marine veteran Shamar, who didn't want to build a shelter, helped the tribe make fire by rubbing 2 sticks together. And it worked. I think that's, like, only the second or third time in Survivor history that's happened. Actual survival skills on Survivor. Who knew?

Back with the Faves, Secret Agent Man put together his alliance, that include Malcolm, Cochran, Erik, Andrea, Corinne and I think the rest of his tribe, actually. He didn't ask them so much as told them. Erik wasn't thrilled that Secret Agent Man ordered him into an alliance, characterizing him as a crazy lunatic or something (sorry, I didn't rewind the DVR to get the exact quote).

The Fans started to put together their alliances, which included Random Guy with Blonde Girl #2. Hey, it's the first episode and I had a long day and I'm lucky I still know MY name, nevermind their names. Meanwhile, Best Looking Guy Here paired up with his Southern Belle and 2 people engaged in some aggressive cuddling that night in the shelter. Unfortunately, I didn't catch their names and probably wouldn't remember the names anyway.

Back at the Faves camp, Cochran discovers that the sun is hot, and that he sunburns easily. It does amaze me that some of these people actually function in the real world. His feet were bright red and swollen.

The aggressive cuddling became the big topic of discussion at the Fans camp.

At the immunity challenge, Jeff commented on Cochran's terrible sunburn, which has now burned a hole in my TV screen. The immunity challenge involved climbing towers, fire station poles, tossing crates, sandbags and targets. These challenges get more and more unnecessarily complex. In a funny faux pas, Jeff referred to the Favorites team as the "Heroes" team. Sorry, Jeff, that's a different variation of Survivor.

The Fans staged a pretty big come from behind win, sending the Favorites to Tribal Council. I kinda hope Francesca gets voted out first again, just because it would be painfully hilarious. But I suspect it will be Cochran the Sunburned Lobster Boy.

Francesca and Lobster Boy wanted to take out Secret Agent Man or Corinne. There was a late push to vote off Andrea. Secret Agent Man wanted to take out Francesca.

Tribal Council was much ado about nothing, really, but they managed to stretch it out for what seemed like 12 hours. And when the votes were counted, Francesca gets the dubious distinction of being voted out first TWICE. Oh, that's gotta sting.

Next week: Russell Hantz's Nephew goes all Russell Hantz on his tribe.
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