Survivor South Pacific Episode 5 Review

Thanks to the wonders of digital cable boxes, while I'm not watching this in HD tonight on our big basement TV, I am watching it in the living room with my laptop in tow, so a longer and more detailed review shall be had.

First off, how did I not notice before that Stacey is a mortician!? Stacey arrived at Redemption Island and proceeded to tell Christine that her tribemates were going to Hell wearing "gasoline drawers" - a reference that probably went over the head of 90% of the audience for about 15 different reasons.

Over at Team Coach, Russell Hantz's Nephew was upset because Mikayla didn't like him because he was Russell Hantz's Nephew. As opposed to when Russell Hantz's Nephew tried to vote her out because she was pretty and he was married.

At Redemption Island, Stacey noted that "Benjamin" (Coach) is running the entire team with Albert as his second-in-command. She also said a bunch of other stuff, but quite frankly I didn't understand any of it. But she said Benjamin a lot.

But Christine ended up winning the duel with Stacey, so the mortician is out of the game, and she doesn't get to win any Benjamins (geddit!?).

Meanwhile, Coach didn't like the fact that Stacey revealed to the world his real name is Benjamin. "Could this day get any worse?" he asked, in a quote taken not entirely out of context.

It needs to be said that Ozzy's red paint stain on his camo shirt from episode 1 makes it look like he's been shot through the heart.

Albert found a clue to the immunity idol, which he shared with Benja- Coach. And Coach promptly went out and found the idol. He shared that with Albert, who looked bummed.

For reasons that I can only figure involved "potential high comedy", Cochrane went out on the fishing boat with Ozzy. Sadly, no comedy was to be had, as the scene focussed solely on Ozzy fishing, and Ozzy brought back about a dozen fish. But it wasn't entirely a wasted segment, as it gave Cochrane an opportunity to tell all of us that beyond Ozzy being Fisher Dude, he's basically a lazy lump around camp, getting by on past glories.

The immunity challenge involved both teams having to grab chunks of meat of a roast pig with their teeth and drop it into a basket. Most meat in 10 minutes wins a picnic pack, and immunity. This was a ridiculously fun challenge - part Survivor, part Food Network. And by fun, I mean, completely revolting. Team Ozzy collected more than 22 lbs. of meat. Coach's team won by 2 ounces. Coach's team also won their basket of meat - spit and all. Ick. Cochrane worried they all got herpes. Really.

Jim decided he wanted to get rid of Elyse to break her away from Ozzy. He tried to sway Keith and others to his side. Ozzy, meanwhile, wanted Cochran out.

In the end, Elyse ended up getting the blindside boot to Redemption Island, sparing Cochran and shocking Ozzy.

Next week: Russell Hantz's Nephew even looks like his uncle. And Ozzy declares that he's a free agent.

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